you guys i opened a door to let the dogs out and a fucking spider ran across my foot inside and then i was screaming and my mom dropped a plastic bowl on it to not let it run away and then it fUCKING GAVE BIRTH ON THE FLOOR IN THE BOWL AND THEN WE WERE BOTH SCREAMING
WHAT DO I DO
ITS STILL IN THE BOWL AND ITS JUST HAVING MORE BABIES
IT DROPPED MORE BABIES
MY DADS LIKE GASSING THEM WITH SPRAY AND ITS STILL GIVING BIRTH
YOU GUYS THOSE ARE ALL BABIES
FUCK MY LIFE
There is only one solution:
waking up and getting out of bed during winter, more like
when u want to complain about something but u literally cannot talk to anyone about said thing
It’s miserable and raining outside and if someone can make me a picture of bubbline making out that would be mighty fine
(Note: Source Links in the Years)
- 2017: tumblr user thatsmoderatelyraven’s fluffy chicken makes a guest star appearance at the new president’s inauguration. “it’s been my life goal to meet you” says the president
- 2020: tumblr has tripled the amount of blogs registered. Every pun imaginable has been made, all photos of random things in rooms have been taken in HD format, all quotes have been said. There are no more recognizable url’s, even fahjtekysuleirdtyrzdsd and jiput4qwar8tgahwsf8g9bosdiv are taken. It is a dark time. The end is near.
- 2023: Arthur has just begun its 26th season
The new voice actor’s voice has become so squeaky that only Arthur fans’ dogs can hear him
- 2025: scientists are still scrambling to figure out what “zigazig ahh” is so that they can give the spice girls what they really really want
the spice girls are getting impatient
war is upon us
- 2053: a girl lays on her bed wearing vintage ugg boots. ‘I was born in the wrong generation’ she sighs as she listens to taylor swift and cries over a one direction poster.
- 2066: physical contact has been outlawed. hug dealers tenderly embrace people in the dead of night and shady people hold hands in dark streets
- 2068: Sam Winchester is 85 years old. He begins to suffer severe heart problems caused by being old as fuck. Dean gets in his motorized wheelchair and goes to the nearest crossroads at a speed of 3mph and trades his soul for Sam’s life. It is at this point that even the crossroads demons are beginning to worry about the Winchesters’ unhealthy codependency problems.
- 2088: there is only one tree left. the tree is cut down and used to make a newspaper with the headline No More Trees
- 2137: You open your tumblr profile, again after many years. You click on the message box. 1 message. You click on it.
‘Yes, same here! :)’
And you don’t know what it was referring to beacause you don’t have a fucking sent messages box.
- 3009: a group of humans listen to boom boom pow. when fergie says that she is so 3008 they all stand shocked and realise. fergie is now behind the times. fergie herself has become 2000 and late. this is unbelievable news to the humans. hours later the planet descends into war and chaos.
- 4000: 500 years after the last great war.
Humanity survives in small nomadic tribes.
One tribe has uncovered an ancient artifact from before the wars. They believe if they can solve its riddle, they may be able to unite humanity once more.
What’s amazing is how well some of these fit together…
The highlight of my day
If something bad happens to Kevin tonight
GUYS GRAB YOUR PITCHFORKS
women are literally raised to be subordinate and malnourished and live in fear of murder and rape so no i am not going to feel bad for men having to live up to masculinity which were set in place by men to, again, keep women subordinate
you are literally complaining about having the better end of the stick and it makes me sick to my stomach you can choke on your spoon
your tags about supposed to be used to organize your blog but i use mine to release my inner monologue tbh
this is the best video i have ever seen
this is the only video that matters